Kade Elphinstone is an author and PhD researcher writing from an autistic perspective about autism, empathy, and social justice and understanding.

Essays and short pieces are published regularly on this site, plus there are numerous posts and threads on Mastodon as well as other social platforms.

Kade is currently working on a series of articles called But is it really a deficit?, each looking at a different autistic characteristic that's traditionally seen as a symptom or deficit, and exploring how it might be understood differently when we consider things like social expectations, lived experience, trauma, and ideas about what's ‘normal’. Some of the problems with how we currently understand autism are explored in “The trap of diagnostic circularity”. The first article in the series, looking at autistic “black-and-white thinking”, was recently published in Thinking Person’s Guide to Autism.

There was a recent episode of the podcast ‘Let’s Talk Neurosense’, where Kade (previously known as Katy) responded to recent shifts in the autism conversation, including those associated with Uta Frith. Among the topics discussed was the risk of setting autistic people, professionals, support workers, educators, and others against one another in increasingly polarised ways, and ways in which that risk may be mitigated. The podcast is available on Substack, Apple Podcasts, and Spotify. References for the episode can be found here. In case anyone would like to listen to the earlier podcast this was a response to, the episode featuring Uta Frith is available here.

Articles and books

You can read Kade Elphinstone's writing on Thoughts on Things, or find out more about the book How to Raise Happy Neurofabulous Children below.

A book for parents

Fuzzy reading

How to Raise Happy Neurofabulous Children

By Katy (who now publishes as Kade) Elphinstone, with illustrations by Matt Friedman
Published by Jessica Kingsley Publishers

Neurofabulous book cover

What's it about?

Making the childhood of those we love a joyful and constructive experience

Neurofabulous is a practical and light-hearted book, perfect for any devoted and/or desperate parent. The book gives tips for a wide range of day-to-day situations commonly experienced by families, and especially children, who don't 'fit the norm' in terms of neurotypology.

Written by Kade (previously Katy) Elphinstone, an autistic advocate and active member of the neurodivergent community, and illustrated by cartoonist Matt Friedman (author of Dude, I'm an Aspie), the book includes chapters on At home, Out and about, Friendship, Communication, Health and hygiene, Bedtime and sleep, Physical contact, Emotions, and more.

The practical tips given in the book all come from a deeply gentle and understanding perspective; both of the children themselves, and of the difficulties and doubts we all experience as parents.

In all, the book is concerned with achieving more connection, understanding and growth on all sides - child, parent and (last but not least) society at large!

Who's it for?

Everyone involved with neurodivergent children

Whatever our situation, as parents and carers of neurodivergent children we have got some really important things in common.

Deep care and love. Concern about how our child might do or might get along 'out there'. Certainly the feeling of loving your child so much you'd probably go to the world's end and back, if it would help them to be okay. A deep wish to support them in finding their own way in life, in achieving inner equilibrium and resilience, and in becoming self-confident – and the strong desire that through these things the chance will be gained for their gifts to shine through and be appreciated fully, both by themselves and others.

So we're not asking for much, are we? (!!)

Thankfully there are many practical ways in which you and your child, and in fact your whole family, can find ways towards more joyful and mutually supportive ways of being, leading to a brighter future all round. Many of which are meticulously detailed in our Neurofabulous parenting book.

    About the author

  • Author
  • Kade (formerly Katy) Elphinstone is a parent and works in administration at a Camphill Community for adults with learning disabilities in Scotland. An autistic advocate, speaker and writer, Kade also mentors other parents, offering support, resources and advice.

    About the illustrator

  • Illustrator
  • Matt Friedman is a grant writer, fundraising professional, and cartoonist. He is the author and artist of Dude I'm an Aspie, which depicts life with autism with honesty and humour, using simple yet effective cartoons that are way more powerful than words.